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Home > Archive > Home Repair forum > November 2005 > Im an ANT
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| fsteddie 2005-11-08, 9:21 pm |
| so I put away 6 cord of firewood in april,worked my XXX off,,
Today my sloth neighbor asked me if he could "borrow" some
of my firewood this winter, because he was to busey to get any of his own.
He watched me pile and stack this wood while he drank beer
In june he told me his company gave him a $15,000.00 bonus.
I TOLD HIM TO FUCK OFF
am I a bad person?
| |
| Stormin Mormon 2005-11-08, 10:21 pm |
| From: "§§§Raven§§§" <" §"@nowhere.com>
Subject: The Ant & Grasshopper 2003
Date: Sunday, October 12, 2003 8:42 AM
CLASSIC VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his
house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the
summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.
The grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in the cold.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!
MODERN VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his
house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the
summer away.
Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and
demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed
while others are cold and starving.
CBS, NBC, ABC, and CNN show up to provide pictures of the shivering
grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a
table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How
can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is
allowed to suffer so?
Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody
cries when they sing "It's Not Easy Being Green."
Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where
the news stations film the group singing "We shall overcome." Jesse then
has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.
Tom Daschle &Walter Mondale exclaim in an interview with Peter Jennings
that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both
call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his "fair
share."
Finally, the EEOC drafts the "Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act,"
retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined for failing
to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to
pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.
Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a
defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of
federal judges that Bill appointed from a list of single-parent welfare
recipients.
The ant loses the case.
The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of
the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just happens
to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't
maintain it.
The ant has disappeared in the snow.
The grasshopper is found dead in a drug-related incident and the house,
now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once
peaceful neighborhood.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Vote Republican
--
Christopher A. Young
Do good work.
It's longer in the short run
but shorter in the long run.
..
..
"fsteddie" <fsteddie2000@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:11n2hstan1kj708@corp.supernews.com...
so I put away 6 cord of firewood in april,worked my XXX off,,
Today my sloth neighbor asked me if he could "borrow" some
of my firewood this winter, because he was to busey to get any of his own.
He watched me pile and stack this wood while he drank beer
In june he told me his company gave him a $15,000.00 bonus.
I TOLD HIM TO FUCK OFF
am I a bad person?
| |
| Stormin Mormon 2005-11-08, 10:21 pm |
| Next year, go ask him for a couple case of beer "cause he has so much and he
can afford to share"
--
Christopher A. Young
Do good work.
It's longer in the short run
but shorter in the long run.
..
..
"fsteddie" <fsteddie2000@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:11n2hstan1kj708@corp.supernews.com...
so I put away 6 cord of firewood in april,worked my XXX off,,
Today my sloth neighbor asked me if he could "borrow" some
of my firewood this winter, because he was to busey to get any of his own.
He watched me pile and stack this wood while he drank beer
In june he told me his company gave him a $15,000.00 bonus.
I TOLD HIM TO FUCK OFF
am I a bad person?
| |
| Sacramento Dave 2005-11-08, 10:21 pm |
|
"fsteddie" <fsteddie2000@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:11n2hstan1kj708@corp.supernews.com...
> so I put away 6 cord of firewood in april,worked my XXX off,,
>
> Today my sloth neighbor asked me if he could "borrow" some
> of my firewood this winter, because he was to busey to get any of his own.
> He watched me pile and stack this wood while he drank beer
> In june he told me his company gave him a $15,000.00 bonus.
>
> I TOLD HIM TO FUCK OFF
> am I a bad person?
>
I would say your the average Working Class guy that gets sick and tired of
" SLOTH'S" trying get everything for nothing. I'm sure he beat a couple poor
working class guys into the ground for his $15,000 and shined all the way.
| |
| Toller 2005-11-09, 1:21 am |
| > I TOLD HIM TO FUCK OFF
> am I a bad person?
>
No, just a bit rude. Simply telling him you needed it all would have been
adequate.
| |
| Norminn 2005-11-09, 7:21 am |
| fsteddie wrote:
> so I put away 6 cord of firewood in april,worked my XXX off,,
>
> Today my sloth neighbor asked me if he could "borrow" some
> of my firewood this winter, because he was to busey to get any of his own.
> He watched me pile and stack this wood while he drank beer
> In june he told me his company gave him a $15,000.00 bonus.
>
> I TOLD HIM TO FUCK OFF
> am I a bad person?
>
Perfectly reasonable. Did you ask him where he planned to put the ashes
when he was done with it?
| |
| Norminn 2005-11-09, 7:21 am |
| clipped
> MORAL OF THE STORY: Vote Republican
>
Well, when the flood comes and all the ants and grasshoppers
are drowning because they did not plan and prepare for every
eventuality, you won't care which one is driving the boat
that carries your sorry XXX to dry land. Drop in at a Red Cross
shelter and see if all of the volunteers are grasshoppers :o)
| |
| Dan Espen 2005-11-09, 12:21 pm |
| fsteddie <fsteddie2000@yahoo.com> writes:
> so I put away 6 cord of firewood in april,worked my XXX off,,
>
> Today my sloth neighbor asked me if he could "borrow" some
> of my firewood this winter, because he was to busey to get any of his own.
> He watched me pile and stack this wood while he drank beer
> In june he told me his company gave him a $15,000.00 bonus.
>
> I TOLD HIM TO FUCK OFF
> am I a bad person?
No, you are a bad business man.
Find out what a cord of wood goes for and offer
to sell him what you have at twice the going rate.
| |
| barry@sme-online.com 2005-11-09, 1:21 pm |
| Well put, IMHO. Pithy, not pissy & whiny with all the left/right
liberal/reactionary crap.
Do charge for delivery, too.
Ever hear the one about the Mainer who set some black-powder charges in
some pieces of firewood in his pile, for just such a neighbor? After a
big puff of smoke up the neighbor's chimney one night, his losses
ceased.
J
| |
| Dan Espen 2005-11-09, 3:21 pm |
| barry@sme-online.com writes:
> Well put, IMHO. Pithy, not pissy & whiny with all the left/right
> liberal/reactionary crap.
Is this cross posted to alt.rave.like.a.lunatic?
Nope, didn't think so.
Some people...
> Do charge for delivery, too.
>
> Ever hear the one about the Mainer who set some black-powder charges in
> some pieces of firewood in his pile, for just such a neighbor? After a
> big puff of smoke up the neighbor's chimney one night, his losses
> ceased.
Careful there, sounds like an IED.
| |
|
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fsteddie wrote:
> so I put away 6 cord of firewood in april,worked my XXX off,,
>
> Today my sloth neighbor asked me if he could "borrow" some
> of my firewood this winter, because he was to busey to get any of his own.
> He watched me pile and stack this wood while he drank beer
> In june he told me his company gave him a $15,000.00 bonus.
>
> I TOLD HIM TO FUCK OFF
> am I a bad person?
If you live in Florida, you could just shoot him when he sets foot on
your property and tell the court you thought he was attacking.
| |
|
|
Dan Espen wrote:
> fsteddie <fsteddie2000@yahoo.com> writes:
>
>
> No, you are a bad business man.
>
> Find out what a cord of wood goes for and offer
> to sell him what you have at twice the going rate.
Then sell him a bunch of green wood, and next spring offer to take it
back for half of what he paid.
| |
| Dan Espen 2005-11-09, 5:21 pm |
| "z" <gzuckier@snail-mail.net> writes:
> Dan Espen wrote:
>
> Then sell him a bunch of green wood, and next spring offer to take it
> back for half of what he paid.
I like the way you think but
what business operates like that?
Make him pay you to take it back.
| |
| HeyBub 2005-11-10, 10:21 am |
| z wrote:
> fsteddie wrote:
>
> If you live in Florida, you could just shoot him when he sets foot on
> your property and tell the court you thought he was attacking.
Your property line is irrelevant to the concept of self-defense. You can
kill someone while they remain on their property, across the street, or on
the moon, if you feel your life is in immediate danger.
When the cops arrive, tell them: "I'm too upset to talk about it. I think
I'm having a heart-attack. I need to go to the hospital. Moan!"
| |
| ds549@webtv.net 2005-11-10, 5:22 pm |
| no not a bad person for denying a rich guy some wood, maybe a little
rude...... but then again, maybe thats the relationship you want to have
with him. lucas
http://www.minibite.com/america/malone.htm
| |
| Stormin Mormon 2005-11-12, 1:21 am |
| Sulphur works, too.
--
Christopher A. Young
Do good work.
It's longer in the short run
but shorter in the long run.
..
..
<barry@sme-online.com> wrote in message
news:1131554004.188628.88670@z14g2000cwz.googlegroups.com...
Well put, IMHO. Pithy, not pissy & whiny with all the left/right
liberal/reactionary crap.
Do charge for delivery, too.
Ever hear the one about the Mainer who set some black-powder charges in
some pieces of firewood in his pile, for just such a neighbor? After a
big puff of smoke up the neighbor's chimney one night, his losses
ceased.
J
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